When Harry met silly

So tomorrow I start teaching my college class and curriculum be damned, I’m going to do my best to once again speak to the class of teens and twenty-somethings about personal brand, privacy, and the impact on their future selves. 

I posted once or twice before on this topic, notably years ago when Michael Phelps was photographed taking a hit off a bong, and my essential points are the same: nothing is private. That is true of royals and celebrities, and it’s true of little ol’ you, too. The difference is whether we have the coverage thrust upon us (Harry, Michael) or we go looking for it (future employers, clients). 

I don’t think the point is lost on Gen Y and Millennials (after all, Harry was quoted in Vegas, in a prediction worthy of Nostradamus,  that he had to be careful or else he’d be ‘up on Twitter or Facebook or YouTube thanks to somebody’s mobile phone camera’ ) but the understanding of privacy and long-term impact of their actions is lost on young people. Even on young men like Harry - steeped in tradition, highly scrutinized, with a closely guarded upbringing. In fact, it should be noted that unlike the US, and in spite of its tabloid history, the UK has laws meant to keep certain scandals out of the papers. The Royal Family argued that if UK papers were to publish photos of Harry’s Vegas game of strip billiards (which he apparently lost) it would violate UK press and privacy laws. Of course, the UK’s Sun argued that the photos are already in the public domain, and that publishing them is therefore not a privacy violation. It’s an antiquated notion... it's just not possible to take back a digital photo or badly worded tweet. As former democratic representative Anthony Weiner certainly understands, once it’s out there, it’s done. That’s the benefit and the curse of communication technology today. 

So let me suggest to those who find temptation…, well, too tempting. Be aware that every decision you have made has led you to this moment. Every decision you make from here on out will determine the course of the rest of your life. That has always been true, but in today’s digital age, there is no longer an opportunity for a do-over. Every decision you make is one-and-done. 

Here are three things to understand to help evade the seemingly inevitable:

1. You do not need to be on camera to legitimize yourself.  Learn to understand the importance of private moments, private thoughts, private actions, and private lives. Work hard to keep them that way. There is power in having and keeping secrets.  

2. You must choose your friends wisely. You may only have only had a single beer at that party, but there you are in the photo, standing next to the naked dude being held upside down on the keg. I’m not suggesting you can’t let loose and have fun, but you need to understand that the concept of ‘guilt by association’ is valid, like it or not. 

3. Remember what Ben Franklin said. No, not “early to bed…,” although that’s a good one. I’m thinking of “Three people can keep a secret only if two are dead.” 

Finally, remember this, which ties in particularly well with pictures of Prince Harry’s ginger crown jewels: Privacy is like virginity: It’s the most valuable thing you possess, and once it’s gone, it’s never coming back.

Related articles

• How Facebook design tricks people into trading away privacy
• How U.K. Tabloids Are Getting Around Prince Harry's Nudity Warning
• California To Tackle Privacy Crimes With New DOJ Unit

Nowhere to hide

So we found out this week that the Texas Rangers' Josh Hamilton fell off the wagon last January. And from the photos (note there is no link attached to that word, at least from this blog - I'll get to that in a moment) he landed hard. The married Hamilton, offered a second chance at baseball after falling into drugs while a young ballplayer convalescing an injury, was photographed drinking, carousing, and essentially behaving like a fratboy at his first kegger. Unfortunate, but not unexpected. Experts say relapses in recovery are common. Fortunately for Hamilton, he told his family and team the very next day so this story is old news now, some eight months later - at least to those who matter.

Olympic phenom Michael Phelps was photographed months ago taking a bong hit at a college party. (I blogged on the topic here.) He lost some major endorsements, apologized, and hopefully learned an important lesson. Whether that lesson is "Just Say No" or "make sure you can trust the people you party with" is unknown, but truth is, both are valid lessons.

I'm not linking to or reposting any of these related images, and I'm not going to comment with some false air of indignation about the behavior of these athletes. I actually tend to take the position of SNL comic Seth Meyer in this outstanding SNL rant. ("If you're at a party and you see Michael Phelps smoking a bong and your first thought isn't "Wow, I get to party with Michael Phelps" and instead you take a picture and sell it to a tabloid, you should take a long look in the mirror...") It isn't in my nature to build people up just for the thrill of tearing them down - as if accomplished, public people were nothing more wooden blocks stacked by some sugar-ravaged five year old. In my experience, most tend to punish themselves just fine on their own.

My marketing mind however pauses and recognizes that each of us, our companies, and our values are subject to the whims of small minded people and rabid opponents who are using the tools of the Internet and social media to gain even the most morally tenuous ground or simply force their way onto the 15 minute stage with a sensational bit of useless gossip. Therefore, it is critical that people and organizations not ignore these new communication tools, but engage them to monitor and proactively defend their brand - whether corporate, product, or personal. As social media consultant Shama Kabani stated in a recent presentation to CEO Netweavers, "...whether or not you want (photos and personal information) out there, its out there. The point is to build up a credible persona in person and online to counter any negative consequence."

Fortunately for Hamilton and Phelps, they've handled their scandals well, offering quick acknowledgment and heartfelt apologies. In the end, the best revenge is their stellar athletic performances since. In the few days since the Hamilton story became public, he's been hitting .360, and for his part, last week Phelps once again set a new world record, this time in the 100m fly. Sometimes the best response is continue to do what you do best.

Or in other words, in a world where all the hiding places are mic'd, let the world know that you are still trying to be the people our dogs think we are.